I have been in the Healing Spirit for the last few weeks. I can literally "feel" the weight of negativity and inner struggle leaving my being. Now no battle is ever won and evolving is something that goes on forever but I am making significant strides. Series of events have brought me to senses that I never knew existed within my body. I have solidified being totally in tune with my intuition and going along with what I feel is right. Outside influences, although they are sometimes very close associates, can fuck you up in the long run.
One of my first and most obvious breakthroughs was when I took a look back at my journal entries. I saw the amount of stress, anger and uncertainty I brought into situations that I wanted or needed to go well. I laughed because I wondered how I could expect things to go well for me when I was always being so pessimistic about it. I am the controller of my destiny, and with a little inspiration from the Divine Order...my life is still ALL in my hands.
-So with this energy, it was like closing a door from my past...for good. I have performed energy healings on others but as I lay in my bed, contemplating, the voices of the Most High came over me and I followed the instructions. I healed myself...seriously. Mentally, totally, drastically. I cleansed my mind and my womb from the toxic relationships I had (both romantic and otherwise). I cleared my room and living space of all the negativity and I breathed easy, for once.
You don't know how much baggage you need to clear yourself from until you start clearing it. Things that you THOUGHT you forgot about are still deep in the recesses of our brains and hearts and cause spiritual blockages. We are beings of light, the Divine Energy within us blessed from the Most High. This beautiful, Black skin I wear is nothing but a vessel, and cannot hide the turbulence I hide inside.
I'm not perfect, I am not completely healed....but as stated earlier, I made significant strides toward the promised land of milk & honey....all available here on Earth to me.
So I will end by saying that a transformation is a life-long process.I know that I am wise beyond my years and most people my age don't even want to hear about any spiritual enlightenment....for FEAR it may take away from them the guilty pleasures of life they love the most. Let me assure you, I do what I want, but know...you ALWAYS reap what you sow. A laugh now may be a cry later....
-When the walls of your own entrapment break down, you start to see others around you for what they are. You start to see the way others may be using you (for financial gain or anything else), you see the mistake you made cutting that one person who really gave a damn about you out of yout life. You start to see the intricacies of life....EXACTLY for what they are.
I have cut people off, and I have no plans of returning. I graduated last Sunday and after a walk across that stage, I took all of my sanity back with me.All of my Love, my hope, my graciousness, my passion...all of the things that fuel my fire of life...I took it back. Today marks the day where I only distribute my goods to those who are well deserving. Being spiritually conscience does not mean becoming a slave to the needs of others. There is a way to take care of your needs first without being selfish. Today is just one of those days.Today, and every day that follows, I will trust what Erin wants, what Afiyana needs.I have no time for the greedy hearts of those who pretend to be brothers and sisters.
Heal. Transform Your Life. There is no right or wrong way to do it. Tune into yourself and let the rest fall into place. God gave you your third eye to see.....see beyond the fallacy of reality.
I Love....but the most Love comes from those who return the Love back.
R.I.P. to all of the fallen ancestors who live in the sky, the mountains, the plains of the world. The trees, the dust, the air...everywhere. My transformation begins NOW....when will yours?